janeiro 20, 2005

more about relationships

What does it take to start a relationship?

How to start a relationship, someone dear to me asked me today. I wrote her a mail back, and decided to shamelessly copy-paste the text and recycle it here (not that I have enough principles to feel guilty about it..)

"Dont ask me. I am alone in no-relationship-land and proud of it. IMHO, it is a gross mistake to put the emphasys on the "relationship" rather than on the "person".
whenever somebody comes to me "I am looking for a relationship so and so bla bla" I think to myself "I will be damned if you won't get what you think you want, but it will not be what you want!". If you go around looking for the "relationship" you're just asking to find people that have nothing to do with you, and worse, desperate out of loneliness, just for the sake of the "relationship". I ve been there also, but I had enough of it! With me it has recently been more, I accept my loneliness, I even appreciate it and ENJOY IT beyond belief, I care about my own business, my hobbies, my interests, and either I meet somebody expontaneously sooner or latter in connection to my interests, or I am so relaxed and unobcessed about finding someone, that it happens naturally in some other environment (e.g. a party...). But it is that being so relaxed and unexpecting about it that makes the magic happen when you least expect it!"

Good luck though, G.!

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